As I walked past the corridor of the seventh grade wing of Capshaw Middle School, I heard two girls making fun of another girl. The girl taking the bullying was crying. A week before, she had experienced the same and yet the insults seemed to be getting much worse. I was a seventh grader, too and yet I was afraid to stand up for the girl. I was afraid I would be the next victim.

I was also afraid of Sarah's ability to cope with so much cruelty. Why does this happen? Sarah had hard enough times to deal with lately. Her mother recently walked away from her dad and two brothers. Sarah felt the weight of the world on her shoulders. Now she was to be the "mom" in the household. Her brothers were 5 and 8 years old and Sarah felt she had to help out her dad.

Why would her mom just up and leave? It made her angry but she was the kind of person that tried to make the best of things. She had to take a stand at home and now school would present the same obstacle. Why do these things happen in life to those who are already struggling with the same issue?

We know life is a classroom and there are many lessons we come to earth to learn in order to become the spiritual beings we long to be. Here Sarah was dealing with the kind of mental abuse in the form of bullying and it would require her to take a stand for herself. At home she was dealing with a similar situation.

She was a young girl and her dad expected her to fill the shoes of her mother who now was absent. In both situations she needed to love herself enough to stand up for herself. Lessons in life that reoccur often point out the very important reason why we came to earth. They point us to something we need to overcome in order to move into another stage of learning.

Bullying can happen to the best of kids. When kids try to push others around they often pick on those who already have enough on their plate. Maybe they sense something lacking in that person and this gives them the reason to add more injury. After all they feel good when they hurt others.

But why does it happen and how can we begin to make changes? Let's begin by understanding why someone chooses to bully another. To begin with they have lost their unconditional love for themselves. Those that bully are hurting inside and in order to feel better they simply have to feel more powerful.

Bullies need to feel like they are in control over something or someone. Most likely it is brought on by struggles they deal with at home or even how they relate to other students in school. It all originates from how they feel about themselves and this causes them to hurt others.

Bullying is brought about by an internal belief system within the bully that they have, about the world around them. If they feel the world is hostile, they feel an out-of-control feeling which causes them to respond with force. In order to feel good about themselves they need to make sure others suffer.

We must first protect those that receive emotional abuse by standing our ground in our schools. We cannot turn our backs on these students. The lessons to be learned are in three areas.

One is in the school system. There needs to be more awareness and a "no tolerance" policy. Each student needs to be taught respect for everyone. School is for learning and this is no different.

Second is in the one being bullied. We need to teach the students that they need to stand up to the bully. I am not talking about fighting but about boldness. When a student faces this kind of situation it is an opportunity for them to personally grow and gain love and respect for themselves.

Taking a stand can only happen when we see we are worthy to be respected. So we need to teach the student they are loved and worthy of respect no matter how someone treats them. They need an understanding of unconditional love for themselves.

The third area is in helping the ones who want to bully others. They should not be left out. The bully is suffering the most and they need to have an opportunity to understand themselves and to choose different. This is a win-win situation if we do it right.

Education is an ongoing process and the kind of behavior that belittles, intimidates, and overpowers others physically and mentally is as important as teaching reading or math. The school systems today teach many subjects but one subject they lack is in teaching the worthiness of each individual.

The truth is that all people throughout life, must learn about mental and physical abuse, so why not begin in the school system. If we allow ourselves to be physically and mentally abused as children, then we are setting ourselves up for the same as adults.

We need to understand that God created us through unconditional love. We are loved no matter what we do in life. Yes, God doesn't base His love on conditions we need to live up to. We need to have the same love for ourselves.

When our love for ourselves is unconditional this means we don't have to live perfectly or do everything right all the time. It also means when we do make choices that are not advantageous to others, and ourselves we can forgive ourselves. Forgiving ourselves takes away the anger and fear we take on when we feel guilt and frees us to accept love for ourselves.

Life is a classroom and we must see the lessons. Although hard at times they have the potential to teach us. We must make a stand first for ourselves, that no one has the right to hurt us.

When we love ourselves unconditionally we actually teach others to love us in the same way. When you respect yourself, others begin to respect you. What you send out into the cosmic mirror of the universe, you receive in return. Karma is your teacher.

Become the change you want to see and your whole life will change. We are presented to address bullying over and over because we have not allowed ourselves to learn the incredible lessons that can transform our lives. Yes, we are all to benefit and the lesson is waiting for all of us.